i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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