with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize