..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
People with herpes should wear stickers.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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