it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
