Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm at about main and main street
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
