Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
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