do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
