You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
