Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Someone shit on the floor
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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