elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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