Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
