i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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