I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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