She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
