she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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