Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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