did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Text me some of your sweat
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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