it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
