im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize