I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I need water and some morals
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
