I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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