the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
