Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
