If that was your dad, he is hot
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
