his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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