I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
