Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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