I wish I could punch you in the face.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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