Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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