Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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