I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
This is the high leading the old right now
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
