Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
