Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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