tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
