yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
