i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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