i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
