i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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