Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
