I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
