Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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