Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Randomize
