Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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