she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
