This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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