Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
