Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize