I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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