So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
