This is not my ceiling
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
